we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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