weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
