Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
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