You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
