Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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