We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
