saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
zippers are such a cool invention
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
