I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
