we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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