Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize