I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Randomize