Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
