dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
