So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
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