Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
