Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
