your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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