Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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