Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
