He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
