The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
