My brain says no but my pants say off.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
he had hair everywhere except his balls
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Randomize
