yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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