i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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