You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
