This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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