Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Randomize