can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
