dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize