can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
MIDGETS
????
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
