Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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