at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
