I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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