Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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