That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
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