Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Randomize
