Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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