i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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