You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
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