Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
