i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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