party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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