Christians are straight up FREAKS
your thong is hanging out like whoa
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
