called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
