On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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