I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize