found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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