Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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