Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
