you guys were way drunker than both of me
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
