Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
